Comments on: The Baby Whisperer Book

By: daisymelan

daisymelan — Sat, 22 Oct 2011 13:53:36 +0000

I really would need some more details to help you with this. Most importantly, what does your daughter’s day time routine look like? How often does she feed? Is she getting a full feed? Have you introduced food? All of those variables would change how I could respond to your answer. With the information you have provided, I would believe there could be two issues.

1. Your baby is not getting enough milk during the day and is waking to make up for it.
2. Your baby has not learned to self sooth or put themselves back to sleep once stirred and relies on you to do it for them.

Please send a bit more info so I can help you better.

By: daisymelan

daisymelan — Sat, 22 Oct 2011 13:51:02 +0000

Hi David,

Yes, when a child wakes and is soiled, please do change their diaper. EASY is only designed to be a gentle routine, not a defined schedule. Take care of baby’s needs first, then go with the routine. If my baby woke as you described, I would quickly change them and go on to feeding them. If there was still time left I would keep them awake and then continue with the routine as normal.

Also, some children will feed in ten minutes. And even a child that takes 40 minutes to feed at the beginning will probably get much faster as they age. Use the timelines as a loose reminder, but do not get concerned if your baby is not following it to a T.

Good luck!

By: daisymelan

daisymelan — Sat, 22 Oct 2011 13:47:11 +0000

You didn’t mention if your baby is breast fed or bottle fed. That can make the difference on the length of sleep a baby can manage between feeds. A breastfed baby will need to feed more often than a bottle fed baby because of the way breast milk is designed. If your baby is sleeping through the night except for two feeds and is happy, then I don’t think there is anything to change at all. All babies will be different and work on their own schedule/routine. The only important thing is to watch your baby and follow their lead. You can drive yourself sick researching baby sleep issues because there is so much information out there and so much of it is conflicting.

The only way that you could identify too much sleep is if your baby is not falling asleep well or is difficult to put back down after a night feed. If not, then you it sounds like you are doing a fantastic job!

By: Cathy B

Cathy B — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 12:43:55 +0000

Hi. I am using the 4 hour EASY routine for my baby who has just turned 4 months old which is generally going well. However, I am wondering whether my baby may be getting too much sleep during the day? (4 hrs and 45 mins in total). My baby wakes twice a night for feeds. I would like him to sleep for a longer stretch. other authors such as Gina Ford for example reccommend only 3 hours for a baby aged between 4-6mths. I’m confused. Please can you help?

By: David

David — Tue, 11 Oct 2011 15:46:46 +0000

Hi, My name is David, I am getting ready to have my first baby, I been reading the book I love, but I have a question about the EASY method, looks like you have to feed your baby for about 20 to 30 minutes before you do the activities means change diapers or shower or wherever you need to do before to putting the baby to sleep, but what happen if the baby wake up hungry and piss and poop. how the method EASY works, I can’t not feed the baby before I change the diaper, so now I will have the method AESY activity first and feeding after. if somebody can explain that to meet that be great. Thank you. and have a great day.

By: dcmom

dcmom — Tue, 23 Aug 2011 18:23:43 +0000

Hi. My daughter is now 6 months old and mainly breastfed, but can take a bottle of breastmilk. She is still waking up 4-6 times a night and usually eats. I put her back in her pack and play after she is done and almost instantly passes back out(the pack and play is next to my bed while I breastfeed. I’d like to start training her to sleep through the night and not wake up so often. I was able to wean my son off of his bottle, then do PUPD to get him to sleep through the night, but am not sure how to do this with my daughter because she is breastfeeding. And I REALLY don’t want to pump if I don’t have to in the middle of the night. Do I just not let her on the boob at all and do PUPD from her dreamfeed through 6am?

By: D.C. Harris

D.C. Harris — Sat, 09 Jul 2011 22:13:51 +0000

Thank you for responding as your feedback has been valueable. To answer your questions: What is her parenting style and what I mean by that is… does she nurse on demand? Nurses on demand. Does she aim for any type of structure for the little one? Some structure observed but the feeding routine is: Feed/burping/place in bed when asleep. Have you heard her say she is opposed to anything? Not directly but via my son. Do they cosleep? No. At night: She sleeps anywhere from 3-4hrs up to 8hrs straight. During the day with me, I have had 10 min naps up to 2.5 hr naps. Any medical concerns? None Is there anything to indicate that baby is not well? Very healthy baby Does baby keep all food down? At times, no but that is getting much better, spit-ups are 1-3x daily. Are the cries in pain or simply because baby is fussy? Pain on occasion but most often due to fussiness. Also, what is the baby’s feeding pattern during the day when taking the bottle from you? Day feeding is also on demand. I might add, bottles are each 4-5oz each of half breastmilk, half sensitive formula mix and usually about once per day, one bottle with some rice cereal (1-3 T.). But all is on demand. When she isn’t satisfied quickly (less than 1 hr)after 2 bottles then that is when she has cereal (cereal has been given for about 2.5 wks now).
Since I first wrote, next evening I brought up the book and a couple of topic areas in it to my daughter-in-law, hoping for her openness that we could work together. The only comment made was that she read ‘Baby Wise’, which outlines the EASY approach but it did not work for her – the baby requires more feeding before putting to sleep. However, from conversation with my son the next morning, which resulted a few negative comments from my d-i-law to him, it was concluded that it might be best that the grandbaby would do better in a day care setting.
In consulting with my husband, my sounding board, it is best that I just back off and let my son/d-i-law raise their daughter as they see fit.
Please know that I love them all soo very much and do not want to cause issues with thier baby and our family relationship. This is a sensitive issue and don’t want to cause any more sadness here, I only want a happy baby.
I truely am grateful for your feedback. But is there any way you can respond to me via my e-mail address and remove my postings-please.
thank you so very kindly.

By: daisymelan

daisymelan — Thu, 07 Jul 2011 18:28:41 +0000

First off, HUGS… Big squishy hugs. You are in a really tough spot right now. By the sounds of it, this is mom’s first baby. What is her parenting style and what I mean by that is… does she nurse on demand? Does she aim for any type of structure for the little one? Have you heard her say she is opposed to anything? Do they cosleep? I am assuming that baby doesn’t sleep well at night ether.

It sure does sound like the little one is fussy, but *my* personal opinion is that even a content baby would become fussy if they were being misread. Most little ones cannot be happy with only 15 minute naps. What is more typical is a 1.5 hour nap or longer.

Now, are there any medical concerns? Is there anything to indicate that baby is not well? Does baby keep all food down? Are the cries in pain or simply because baby is fussy? Also, what is the baby’s feeding pattern during the day when taking the bottle from you?

Simply put, I believe baby’s at this age should be on EASY. Refer to the book for that as that is the premise behind everything Tracy Hogg teaches in her books. She teaches a structured routine so that when baby cries, you can determine the cause.

I do know that if all care givers are not on the same page, that it is going to be extremely difficult for you. However, if the mother is not objecting about a routine (notice I don’t say schedule) then I suggest you take to EASY and do your best in the day… mom will likely notice a much happier baby who doesn’t spend all their time upset because their cues are not being read properly. Ultimately, you would want mom to agree and work with you when the baby is in her care, that way making sure she is being supported in the same manner 24 hours a day.

I do not believe any child needs to be nursed to sleep. When my son was around 3 months I was in tears constantly as all he wanted to do was nurse nurse nurse and never slept… just as you are describing the baby you have in your care. I then discovered the Baby Whisperer, EASY and the Shh/Pat method taught in the books and my life became so much better! Truly. Baby’s don’t know what they need, adults do. But sometimes we need to be taught first in order to teach our little ones. I remember the first day I implemented EASY… I Shh/Pat my son to sleep and he fell asleep within five minutes… slept for over an hour and then I nursed him…. Then the tears were of joy. It really can be that simple when you know how to do it. It’s not always that easy, but it is for a lot of parents.

Feel free to ask me more specific questions and I would be more than happy to help. I really hope you can get the little darling to a happy place.

By: D.C. Harris

D.C. Harris — Thu, 07 Jul 2011 15:39:20 +0000

I am a grandparent who has started babysitting (Mon-Fri)a 3 1/2 month old. The Mom breastfeeds when she is home in the pms & weekends and the baby takes the bottle very well during the day. However, the baby is a held/nursed until she falls to sleep and when she fusses even a little fussing, she is picked up and held when with her parents. Mondays are the very hardest day for me as I am trying to help her be more independent and to be able to explore some. The baby wants to be held much of the time everyday as her way to cope with everything. I need your guidance to better work with a frequently fussy/dissatified baby and help with the parents routine as well. I love my daughter-in-law & son but find it hard to handle this situation as well as think it might not be best for the baby’s development & independence. Please advise.

I have just started reading Baby Whisper book and hope that will help. Til I am done, PLEASE give me words of advise to handle this sensitive situation.

By: daisymelan

daisymelan — Fri, 17 Jun 2011 12:48:06 +0000

Please note that the information in the Baby Whisperer book is very old and if Tracy Hogg were still alive, she would probably update a lot in the breast feeding section. Have you seen a lactation consultant? What did they say about feeding your little one? Is there a reason your breast is lazy? A lot of women will have more difficulties breastfeeding from the side where they are using their non dominant hand to hold their babies head. For instance, if you are righthanded, your child will likely have a harder time nursing from your right breast. If this is the case, it can simply be the change of hold to help your child get more milk. However, I am only guessing. If there is a medical reason for it, please, do what you need to do to feed your little one. I know a mother who breastfed for months with only one breast because her other breast did not produce milk at all. Her little one thrived.

I would continue to stimulate your other breast though. After nursing, you could use a pump on that breast for 10 minutes to keep it stimulated. Feel free to update me with all your info and help you the best I can.